A wedding, 2 engagement sessions and 1 proposal all in less than 24 hrs!
Today was one of THOOOOOOOSEEEE Days of motherhood!
The kind where your kids wake up fighting, nobody’s sleeping, and you are literally counting down the minutes until bedtime because it seems like every stinkin’ one of them has lost their stinkin’ minds!
But then this happened…
My 5 year old hit her sister… AGAIN… for like the 2385273504th time today!
It took every ounce of self-control in my being not to scream at her. Seriously, SHE KNOWS BETTER! But instead I sighed (one of those “better get right with Jesus before I kill my kid sighs…”) and I sent her up to her room. I waited until her wailing, stomping and fit throwing stopped and I went upstairs to chat.
Instead of finding her in her own room, I found her in mine. Because kids… 😬
She was sprawled out on the bed, all teary-eyed and red-faced, holding a picture of my husband and I. Not sure what was going on with the picture, lol, the last couple of weeks I’ve found her after moments like this, holding it. But I ignored it and I scooped her up in my arms and I patiently talked to her about the importance of how we treat others, why she got in trouble, and what we should do differently next time.
As we were leaving my room, she placed the picture of my husband and I back up on our dresser. Curiously, I asked her, “How come you always grab this picture when I send you upstairs to calm down?” Her response was incredible... she said, “Because, mama, when I’m in trouble and feel sad and mad… this picture reminds me of how much you love me.”
Talk about heart-melting. I think I had to literally pick my jaw up off the floor as I wiped my sobbing tears from my eyes…
It was one of those mom moments where you go from irritated and exhausted, to, I love you so much I could die in like 5 seconds flat.
You guys… my 5 year old just described the importance of pictures better than I ever could. As a photographer, I always hope that people know that pictures are not JUST for social media. No, they are SO MUCH MORE important than that!
They remind us that no matter how alone we feel in the world, there is a community of people that love us and cherish us and will always support us.
Pictures remind us where we come from. They tell a story. They have the ability to make us laugh and make us think. They trigger emotions and inspire actions. Pictures can indeed, change the world we live in because they change people.
I just had to share this amazing mom moment with you guys!
I hope you have a good day with a little bit (or a lot) of Rest & Relaxation *just* for you mama!
“Busy season” is upon us and my days are filled jam-packed with photo session through December. Everyone longing for that perfect Christmas card photo or that perfect family portrait with those changing fall leaves! Not to mention that in fall life just gets busy! Which means, that you, your hubby, and your kids are living life in stress mode!
Stress mode is NOT a good mode to be in when you come to a photo session. I mean, unless you want stiff posing, fake “cheese” smiles, and crying pictures. Which… if that’s what you want… i’m not your girl! However, if you want the photo session to be relaxing, encouraging, fun, and life-giving, then look no further!
Stress-free photo sessions are my jam! It doesn’t matter what type of photo session you are booking! I want the experience to leave you feeling refreshed and not stressed. I want the images to give you hope and encouragement…
Therefore, i’m giving you my BEST TIPS to help your photo session be as stress-free as possible! Here we go!
1.) Think ahead
I realize that you might not really think about your October schedule until August or September. I, however, have my October schedule almost completely full 3-6 months in advance. And if you want an evening or a weekend… BOOK EVEN SOONER! Those spots are PRIME SPOTS because most of my clients work and are only available weekends. Plus, weekdays are full of school, evenings activities, and trying to get kids motivated and ready after school when they just want to play is never fun! So, get ahead of the game and book your Session WAYYYYY in advance! These months typically book the fastest: May, June, September, October, November. Also, make sure you take into consideration the time of year! An outdoor session in January when it might snow with your 3 month old is probably not a good idea!
2.) BUY YOUR CLOTHES
I do everything in my power to enable you with the tools you will need to feel “ready” for your session by the time it comes. Style Guides, Questionnaires, Blog Posts, Videos, etc. However, if i’m being honest, if you try to come up with 8 peoples outfits in 2 days, it’s going to be stressful! Make sure that the minute you book your session (and probably even WAYYYYYYYY before that) you plan/shop for your outfits! Plus, the more time you have to warm your husband up to the idea of wearing a sport coat and get your kid used to wearing a “itchy sweater” the better. Check out this blog post I wrote about my FAVORITE places to shop for photo session clothes and this live video below on what clothes look best on camera.
Let’s chat for a hot second about expectations! When you are prepping for your photo shoot… make sure to lay out your expectations for your guy, for your kids, and for yourself! The sooner the better! I’ve noticed that if you take the time to lay out what to expect and set realistic expectations it really empowers them to handle the whole entire process better. Here are some typical things to expect:
You will ask your hubby’s opinion on outfits, tell him to pretend to care (and because he really doesn’t, feel free to email me, text me, or facebook message me for my opinion if you want ;) )
The day of the session, you will probably be feeling insecure, nervous, and a little stressed because you haven’t been in front of a camera in a year and you don’t like ______________ about yourself, so warn your hubby ahead of time that now is not the time to get mad and grumpy at you for planning this in the first place.
Let him know that the kids might cry a time or two and that’s okay! It will be okay! Plus, if you don’t normally bribe your children, now is great time to let him know that it may happen….
Tell your kids this is going to be fun! Let them know we are going to play games together, give tickles, etc. Your attitude about all of this DIRECTLY affects their attitude of it all! Start introducing different types of bribery to see what will work!
Explain to him that getting kids ready for a photo shoot is NOT easy and you are going to need his help by doing __________________. Whether it’s helping get them bathed and dressed or keeping them clean after you get them dressed.
Learn more about prepping your man by checking out the “Grumpy Guys blog post here!”
4.) Involve your hubby!
You know how when already have a toddler and you are having a new baby in the family how you ask for that toddler’s help after the baby arrive’s (ex: can you be my big helper and go get a diaper for mommy!, etc.). Plan on doing the same thing for this! Both men and children react better if they are involved or at least FELL involved in the process. Nobody likes being told what to do, especially if it seemed like a waste of time. Let’s be real, if my hubby told me I had to sit and watch golf with him for the next 2 hrs, while the kids are screaming and crying and I couldn’t leave or be on my phone, and have to keep a smile on my face the whole time, then I would be really ticked.
So let’s start including our hubby and kids in the process.
Tell him why photos are important to you… and “its for the Christmas card” or “to post on social media” doesn’t count! I’m talking about digging deep and telling him why having photos of you during this stage are important. Maybe you tried to get pregnant for years and never thought it was going to happen… maternity photos are always going to remind you of that blessing. Maybe its because your kids are driving you nuts, your tired and weary, and you find that when you look at photos of them it re-energizes you and keeps you invested in that relationship. Maybe its because you were adopted and don’t have any photos of your past to call your own. Maybe you want your kids to see photos of them hanging all around your house so that they have confidence and know that they are loved. Whatever the reason, explain it to him! Because he loves you he will see that your reasons for wanting photos aren’t superficial and he will care about it more!
Show him why you chose me! Take him to my website, have him watch my branding video, or show him that one blog post that you loved so much! Take him to my facebook and show him how each week I post about authentic motherhood and how every time you read it you feel like I get you, like you aren’t alone, and it encourages you! Show him the sneak peeks and the live videos and all the things that when thrown together made you say, “I choose her!”
Have him fill out the questionnaire with you! If you’ve been a client of mine in the past you KNOW that after selecting a date and time! I send you a bunch of resources that will help you plan your shoot (because knowledge is power, right!?!) but I also send you a questionnaire and I ask you to fill it out together! Why? Because it really gives your significant other insight into your life and you into his. It forces you to pause, take a deep breath, and remember your story. Remember why you chose each other and why you continue to choose each other every single day. It develops feelings of connection and empathy in you both as you open up. It allows you step out of autopilot and have a special moment where you fall back in love with each other all over again! On this questionnaire I ask a variety of questions about your past, present and future. Not because i’m giving you busy work…. but because as a creative i’m inspired by your story! I allow your story to change details about the session! The poses I choose, the social prompts I use to get certain expressions, the location, etc. All of it is used to create a session that feels like you as a couple… you as a family!
Involve your guy in the process and he won’t just pretend to care, this whole thing will become not just YOUR thing but his too!
5.) Set the Scene
Before I took my kids to their first parade, I was trying to tell them why we were going and what it would be like. I mentioned how the people throw candy at you and you get to bring it home! A couple hours later my daughter was FREAKING OUT, not wanting to go! I was so baffled and couldn’t figure out why! Until finally she said… “You said people throw candy at us… thats mean!” Hahahahhahahaha!
We are responsible for our kids view of photo sessions! If you act stressed out about it and make it not fun for them then they will NEVER want to do photo sessions again. If you relax, it will be so much better! FOR EVERYONE! Try not to worry about the faces they make, if they dripped water on their pants, or whether or not their listening. Trust me. I do this all the time! Your kid is fine and 100% Normal! Let me handle it! Unless your kid is screaming profanities at you and trying to hurt people, I can handle it!
Make sure you set the scene for your kids ahead of time! This is what i like to call “creating magic” in the minds of your kids. I want you to get them so hyped up about this session that a stranger would think they are going to freaking Disney World. A week or so before the session start telling them about it. Show them pictures of me on my facebook, or my website. Show them how I took pictures of other little kids and look at them laughing. Tell them we get to play games, tickle each other and have fun! Make this photo session look like its going to be so much fun!
6.) Day of the Session
When the day of the session arrives this is your goal… KEEP THE KIDS HAPPY! Do whatever it takes to keep your kids happy. Give them lots of play time and one-on-one time before the session. Make sure they are fed and try to get them to nap. Even if that means driving them around in a car for a few hours. Remind them again about what’s going to be happening and how its going to be awesome. And bring whatever you bribed them with WITH YOU! If you promised them a paw patrol character, buy it ahead of time and keep it in the car. Kids brains doing know how to process delayed gratification and so we must immediately reward them with things as soon as it happens. For younger kids, I even recommend bringing gummi snacks, goldfish, puffs, or some sort of small bribe that you can give them in between shots! Just make sure its not something that will melt or bleed color onto their clothes (like m & m’s). Word to the wise, if you do not want them to have a sucker stick hanging out of their mouth… don’t give it to them during the session! If you don’t want them to be holding the toy in all the images, do not give it to them during the session! Know that I typically do anything that involves kids first so that they can be done ASAP and have their rewards!
7.) Expectations (AGAIN!)
Alright, now the session is done so it’s time for me to hope that you have reasonable expectations for me as well! ;) Did you know that I cull (go through and decide which photos are keepers) around 20,000 photos a month and edit on average around 10,000. Please know that I have around 5-7 people on my list to edit at one time. And that skin-smoothing software that you know and LOVE for me to use on your photos takes a little bit of time to run. That being said, I do post the turnaround time in 4 different emails prior to the session and typically tell you at the session as well in order to make sure we are ALL on the same page! :) Just know that I work every waking minute for you guys and I KNOW how badly you want to see those photos! <3 Trust me! I have a 100% guarantee that you will love the photos! And giving you an unforgettable experience and high- quality photos is what i’m known for! So take a deep breath and know that they are going to be awesome!
Hopefully these tips will ensure a successful, stress-free photo session for you! If you are interested in booking, please contact me here!
Best of Luck!
Before my husband and I got married we did premarital counseling. In one of our sessions our counselor recommending a book called “Sacred Marriage.” In this book, the author, Gary Thomas, unpacks the idea that God’s design for marriage is to make us holy… not happy.
And this one thought changed EVERYTHING.
Any one who has been married for any length of time can tell you that the early years of marriage can be interesting. During those early times issues come up from a variety of things. The fact that we had different upbringings and how that plays out in every day life. The idea that what motivates me and what motivates my husband are completely different. Different definitions of love, different expectations, breaking down ideal views of marriage, communication, needs and wants, hot button issues, intimacy, different personalities… the list can go on and on.
But learning this idea before me and my husband ever said “i do” changed everything for me. It helped me always view my marriage in a selfless light. To remember that it wasn’t there to only serve me. And that really… most of the time… its not about me at all.
These days it tempting for others to look at marriage and wonder why its necessary. It all boils down to the fact that we live in a time where ease & painlessness equal value. The easier something is, the better it is... and if it hurts you... something is wrong and you better get rid of it. (Please no that I am not talking about abusive situations here.)
But life has taught me just the opposite. In fact, sometimes things can be hard and painful and really, really good at the same time.
Marriage is hard.
Relationships in general are hard.
Getting Pregnant can be hard.
Being Pregnant can be hard.
Discipline can be hard.
Parenting IS hard.
Childbirth is hard.
Exercise is hard.
Growth is hard.
Owning a business is hard.
Loving *some* people is hard.
Forgiveness is hard.
Patience is hard.
When things get hard we have 2 options. We can run from the difficulty or we can admit that while yes these things are hard, we have the opportunity to address these challenges head on because frankly, some things in life are designed to make us better people and not just make us happy people.
Sometimes the purpose of something is not for mere enjoyment but instead to be transformed from the inside out and marriage and parenting can DEFINITELY fall into that category.
Don’t get me wrong, are there some really amazing times… absolutely! And they outnumber the bad times. However, the bad times are present and when they are… it feels real and it sucks. But I am able to remember that marriage isn’t always to make me happy but holy instead.
Marriage is designed to reveal something bigger. For my husband and I… we long to use our marriage as a way to proclaim God’s love to the world around us. By me and my husband loving each other and choosing to work through the good, bad, & ugly things that come up… we show the world around us that valuable relationships take work. That sometimes we are on the same page and all is well and other times I have to confront something ugly in myself and get rid of it.
But even stubborn old me can look back at those times fondly knowing that because of our dedication to reconciling our issues…. I am a better person and so is he.
Keep on fighting my friend! It’s worth it!
Jessica and Kaleb recently had their engagement session for their upcoming wedding in October! This adorable couple has been together for 7 years and first met on the dating app: tinder. It’s so funny how more and more couples are meeting online these days! :) These two lovebirds definitely know how to have a good time and were full of laughter despite that fact that their session basically took place in a pig pen (see the image at the bottom of the page for reference). They kept their spirits high and their love was evident! I absolutely cannot wait for this October wedding! It’s going to be PERFECT!